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FAMILY VIOLENCE isn’t one act committed by one person. Communities, Governments, and friends can all be contributors to Family Violence. It wasn’t until 1983 that Canadian law outlawed marital rape [1]. “Family violence is more than just beating a partner or child. It’s the abuse of power to harm or control a person who was or is a family member.”[2] The Alberta Government now recognizes NOVEMBER AS FAMILY VIOLENCE PREVENTION MONTH which replicates a campaign that was started in Hinton in 1986 [3]. So for the month of November we’ll be posting stories that hopefully help identify family violence so that communities are able to recognize there contribution to violence and find ways to end the abuse.

Thursday, 3 November 2011

Had I known.

If I had known how sacred I would feel at times, would I have said 'I Do'?

If I had known how much debt I would endure when he 'couldn't work', would I have shared my credit?

If I knew the guilt & shame that would come from saying no to my 'wifely sexual obligations', would I have invited him into my bed in the first place?

Had I a clue he would become an addict blaming me for his choices, would I have given him my trust?

If I'd had any idea how many walls would be punched in, doors riped off hinges, things thrown, slammed, broken...would I have agreed to share in that life?

Had I been able to see the damages living in that environment would have on our children, the anger & desperation they'd acquire, would I have had these babies?

If I had known that he would want his life to end, that most days were more a challenge than a joy, would I  have allowed myself to love him so deeply?

If I knew for sure that he would change, would I have stayed?

~ Whytelash

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